How to Use Your Personal Life in Comedic Writing
Posted on: Jan 14, 2025

As a traveling stand-up comedian and comedy writer, I tend to encounter two distinct types of people. First, there’s the person who believes they’re universally hilarious, that their life is basically a Netflix special waiting to happen, and they’re just biding their time before headlining Madison Square Garden. Then there’s the person who thinks stand-up comedians are a rare breed of heroes—fearless and brave—because nothing about their own life seems remotely funny or interesting.
Well, I’m here to tell you that both of these people are…wrong. And right. If you combined these two extremes, you’d have the greatest stand-up comedian of all time. The truth is that everything in your life has the potential to be funny. The keywords here are everything and potential. So let’s dive into how you can turn your everyday interactions and experiences into comedic gold.
“Did You See That Ghost?”
Chris Rock once used an incredible analogy to describe stand-up comedians: imagine a group of people sitting in a movie theater, watching a film. Suddenly, a ghost appears on screen. The comedian in the audience immediately notices and points it out, saying, “Hey, did you see that ghost?” But their friends, confused, respond, “What ghost?”
It’s the job of a comedian (and a writer) to notice those “ghosts” in everyday life. A comedian’s job is to say what everyone is thinking, but no one’s saying. To do this, you need to train yourself to look for these moments. Start noticing the quirky, relatable “ghosts” in your life. This is why so many comedians start off their jokes with, “You ever notice…?”
Take something mundane and find the absurdity in it. An example I keep using is the hilariously excessive length of CVS receipts. One of my own jokes is that no matter how bad the world gets—with war, global warming and mass shootings—nothing is harder than trying to put an air mattress back into its original bag.
When you get good at noticing these everyday absurdities, your audience or readers will be hooked, hanging on your every word.
Vulnerability = Relatability
Authentic vulnerability is one of the most powerful tools in comedy. The more honest you are about your “ugly parts,” the more your audience will relate to you and root for you. This is something I continue to work on, but every time I reveal a deeply personal or embarrassing truth onstage, I’m amazed by how much it resonates.
Legendary comedian Richard Pryor built an entire career on this concept, sharing his struggles with addiction and his experiences growing up in a brothel. He turned his darkest moments into universal truths that people could laugh at and connect with.
This applies to writing as well. David Mandel, showrunner for Veep and a former writer for Seinfeld, once said that storylines based on a writer’s real-life experiences almost always got picked above ones that they made up. Similarly, I attended a talk with a former writer for Sex and the City who revealed that the storylines people were most embarrassed to pitch—because they were so personal—often became the most beloved episodes.
Don’t shy away from the authenticity of your lived experience. Embrace it. Your weird, awkward or painful moments might be the very thing that makes people laugh the hardest.
Start Telling Your Stories
Don’t be fooled by the simplicity of this step. One of the best ways to figure out if something you’ve experienced or observed is funny is to tell other people about it and pay attention to their reactions. Now, let’s be clear—no one wants to hang out with someone who’s constantly “workshopping” material that belongs backstage at an open mic, or hell.
By sharing your experiences with others, you’ll start to hone your voice, note what’s funny, and see which parts of your story resonate most with others. Start by telling your stories to friends or family who are supportive and have a good sense of humor. Avoid unloading them on angry strangers, tollbooth workers, or Mark Zuckerberg—unless you want to be blankly stared at by a human alien in a hoodie.
As you get into the flow of sharing, you’ll gain a better sense of what might work in front of a live audience or resonate with readers. So get out there and start talking! A good time to start is when someone is trying to put an air mattress back in its original bag, because you know you’ll have their undivided attention for at least 40 minutes.
Brendan Fitzgibbons is a comedy writer and actor living in Los Angeles. He’s written for Comedy Central, The Onion, NBC, HuffPost and Bravo. As an actor, he’s appeared on Comedy Central, MTV and “Full Frontal with Samantha Bee.” His podcast, “Spiritual As****e” was named a Top Indie Podcast by Stitcher.
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